Dealing With Grief During the Holidays

KEY POINTS

• At least 35 percent of individuals don’t look forward to the holidays because of the loss of a loved one.
• Grief is complicated and unpredictable. It’s important to give yourself time to grieve and heal from the loss of a loved one.
• During the grieving process, it’s important not to isolate yourself but rather to make an effort to surround yourself with others.

The holidays are often a time for celebration, but when grieving the loss of a loved one, those emotions can become intensified. A recent survey of 2,000 people showed that 36 percent of the respondents did not want to celebrate the holidays due to feelings of grief or loss.

Grief is complicated and often unpredictable. It comes in waves and sometimes, like the ocean, it’s calm and chill. Other times, it’s turbulent and violent. We could be in the middle of a holiday party or enjoying the company of friends one on one when suddenly we break out in tears. Sometimes there might be triggers, such as conversations, photographs, or being in places that you were with your loved one, that cause the release of this emotion, while other times it could be a spontaneous eruption. Some of our feelings can be positive or negative ones.

Allow Yourself Grieving Time

Remember that we all grieve differently, even those of us within the same family. There is no right or wrong way to do it. Be gentle with yourself and do what feels right for your needs. If your loss was recent, you might need to carve out more time to process it, during which you should allow time for grieving and reminiscing together: “Grief is visceral, not reasonable: the howling at the center of grief is raw and real. It’s love in its most wild form.”

Take Care of Yourself

Sometimes when we’re grieving, we forget about our own needs, especially if we were deeply involved in our beloved’s care and meeting their physical and psychological needs. In those situations, our loved ones’ needs come first; thus, the adjustment to not having them in our lives becomes difficult. As much as possible, try to return to your return and indulge in activities that bring you joy. It’s important to step aside and consider what tools can help us cope with our loss. Moving our body gets the blood flowing, and it could be something as simple as taking a walk that helps us process our…