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The Secret to Rituals: A Sequence to Ground Yourself
A ritual is a sequence of gestures or habits performed at a certain place and time. Rituals may be prescribed as part of a culture, community, or family unit. They are acts I believe in because not only do they ground us in the moment, but they interconnect us as human beings.
My morning ritual consists of waking up, washing my face, brushing my teeth, having a cup of strong espresso coffee, and taking my 14-year-old Maltese poodle out for his morning stroll in our backyard. Beside the back door is a flashlight that I use to keep me mindful of any coyote sightings. Then I go back inside the kitchen for another shot of espresso. I sit at the table overlooking my backyard sipping my coffee with either a book or a journal in my hand. After drinking my coffee, I go to my meditation room and meditate for 20 minutes. I then get dressed and either go to the gym or to my computer to begin my day’s work. If a situation, person, or event interrupts my rituals, I feel as if I’ve lost my center and my day doesn’t start off right. There just seems to be a sense of indescribable uneasiness.
Whether it’s celebrating a birthday, an anniversary, or the holidays, most of us have some sort of daily, weekly, monthly, or annual ritual. That’s because rituals are patterns of behavior that keep us grounded and connected to ourselves and the world around us. When children are raised with rituals, they grow up with a sense of security and love. Rituals used with senior citizens help them remember more easily. Studies have shown that medical personnel, including doctors and nurses who ritualistically wear white lab coats and stethoscopes, have stronger healing powers than the same professionals who wear street clothes. I believe this to be true.
About two decades ago, when he gave me my first cancer diagnosis, my doctor didn’t wear a white lab coat, although I wish he had. His stethoscope peeked out of his pinstripe suit jacket, and even though he might have thought his demeanor was friendlier without the lab coat, I saw it as a bit cavalier, as if my appointment might have been sandwiched between a lunch date or a lecture at the nearby medical school. While the doctor’s expertise and words instilled me with confidence, I would have preferred that he had donned white clinical garb, like the nurse who’d brought…
